cjdaweasel.com

I’ve posted this elsewhere and normally I prefer to drop my own stuff on this page, but everyone has to see this song remix. Check it out:

The Search for the Funny

Part III : Awesome Stereotypes

So with the first part of my search complete, I moved on to the next, and probably my favorite part; the stereotype. I decided to call the KKK and get a few pointers on exactly how to point out flaws of one person and then attribute them to a whole race of people, and thankfully, they turned out to be a great help. The local chapter I called turned out to be a goldmine of rednecks with a great sense of racism. So I jotted down a few of the groups (along with a few I gathered from other sources such as Jerry Falwell, my grandpa, and a Huck Finn book)

The Huck Finn book was the least helpful considering I couldn’t read it. So to simulate the experience, in a language I’m almost fluent in: English, I tore up my Sega Genesis Instruction manual and threw the pieces in a box. Then I pulled the pieces from the box one by one and put them together. I got “[power butt] [on you]” and “[con] [your hand]“. While neither is very stereotypical, I’m sure that if I put them in a book some Christian group somewhere would protest me.

Without the ability to turn on my genesis, and having no other source of entertainment I turned to Google, my savior, and hoped that its infinite wisdom would guide me to my goal.

The first thing I found looked to be a Tupperware party. I’m not sure what all the bed sheets are about, but that might explain why they kept those burning marshmallows at the end of that long ass pole. Safety first.

The next thing I stumbled upon was a child version of the Blob. While not a stereotype, unless you count toddlers in cute pajamas, which is really scarier than it is funny, it is a picture I’m sure I won’t use somewhere else in my life, so here it is.

Then I found him. The funniest, stereotypical loon I could get my hands on. Let me warn you. When I first looked at this picture I laughed for almost 20 minutes, and was only saved from what would have been certain death by my screensaver, which just gave me the depressing flying Windows. It reminded me that yes, my ass was owned by Microsoft.

Being careful to shield my eyes, I uploaded the picture to this page, which may in fact be a picture of a can of baked beans, since I had covered my monitor with a towel for safety purposes. Meet your comedy doom. Its SUPER MUNCHKIN MAN.

So to recap we have determined that the funniest person is Mr. T, and the funniest stereotype is midgets, and most of all Super Munchkin Man. God was that funny.